I was exited when I saw him walking towards me. His charming smile made my heart beat very fast. I cannot wait anymore. I ran to him. Suddenly, I fell.
I woke up from my dream. Sweet dream end with me on the floor, fell from my bed. Again.
My name is Tina. Kartina Sumanto. Still single. I’m working as a secretary in an office. A big office with hundreds of people working in it and I’m the one who always rushing here and there. Sometimes making coffee, sometimes waiting for my turn to photocopy the documents and most of the time sitting at my place facing the computer screen. That’s me at my office.
I always said to myself that everyday should not become a gloomy day. Although the weather is not good, I still comfort myself and my heart shine like the sun. However, that day was really great. I went to the office with smile on my face thinking about the sweet dream.
On my desk, I saw a white, fresh rose. In the vase besides my computer, there was the one I got yesterday. It has been a month, everyday I went to work and there was a white, fresh rose on my desk. I did not know who gave it to me but I kept it as an appreciation.
“Tina, what’s in my schedule today?” that voice got into my nerves.
“Oh, yes boss! You have meeting with Tan Sri Borhan from Gemilang Holding,” quickly I answered.
He walked away, went into his office.
That was Zack, my big boss. He was the one in my dream. My dream guy. Handsome and stylish but he never attracted to me. For me, I just like him because his good look, not as my future husband. Honestly, he is a playboy.
Enough about Zack, a handsome heartless guy. I was thinking about this ‘rose’s guy’. Everyday, the mystery thickened. Sometimes I felt scared with this secret admire. Maybe he is a psycho man that was looking at me from far away every second. On the other part, I thought he is a shy generous man with simple life. Who knows?
* * *
I read the letter again,
Now, I’ve got the strength to meet you face to face. Please do not think that I’m a psycho man. I’m just one of the person that you already knew. The difference is just my special feeling for you. When you walk out from the office today, look for a guy holding a white rose in his hand.
At 5.00 p.m. , I walked out from the office with a nervous feeling. My eyes were looking for the guy and there he was!
I can’t believe it! Shah was standing there, smiling at me with a white, fresh rose in his hand. I met him everyday in the office. He in Zack’s young brother and also the manager of the office.
“I love white roses,” suddenly I remembered I told him that in our short conversation when I was making a cup of coffee for Zack.
I looked at the clock on the wall and it showed 10.00 p.m. I was watching television. Actually , I was waiting for him. I did not pay attention to the Malay drama. A memory came into my mind. That was a year ago;
Shah was standing there, smiling at me with a white, fresh rose in his hand. I met him everyday in the office. He was Zack’s young brother and also the manager of the office.
He walked towards me. I was numb. Only my eyes were blinked. When he reached me, suddenly, he knelt.
“Kartina Sumanto, would you be my wife, queen in my life?” that question struck like a lightning in my heart.
Hundreds eyes were looking at us. I did not know how many times my heart beat in a second.
“He’s so romantic,” I heard a voice said that.
“He looks honest. I bet you, she will say yes!” there was another voice.
I did not know where the strength came from. My shaky hand took the white rose. I heard the applause from everyone around us. At that time I just realized we were surrounded by many people like we were shooting a drama there. I was so embarrassed, I nearly fainted.
I always smiled when the memory came back. It happened very fast. We were married in a simple ceremony. The wedding ran smoothly. Most of my friends and family were surprised. They asked since when Shah and I became closed.
“God gave me a premonition,” that was my answer.
The truth was, neither myself could not think what was the real answer. I asked myself, how can I trust him? I just knew him from the outside. We only had a short conversation when we met at the office.
However, the question started to disappear when day by day passed and we were husband and wife until now. Now, I really sure that the premonition was right. Last week, we were celebrating out first wedding anniversary. He said it was the best present he ever had when I told him, I had our first baby.
All the flashback flew away when suddenly I heard someone knocked the door. I believed it was him, so I opened the door. There he was! Standing with a smile on his face.
Yes, I felt very happy when he came home. I missed him very much. He went to Cameron Highlands for a meeting. He left me for three days.
“I have something for you,” we had just finished our late dinner. I was washing the dishes.
He put on something around my neck. It was a necklace. A beautiful gold necklace.
“Thanks, ‘abang’” I appreciated the precious gift.
I felt very strange when the clock showed ten minutes before twelve midnight but Shah did not want to sleep yet. He wanted to watch our wedding’s video tape. He sat on the sofa while I laid my head on his lap. At that time, I could feel a coldness from his body. I did not know why. So, I ignored the feeling.
* * *
I opened my eyes. The bright sunlight shone straight to my face. I slept on the sofa last night. I looked around but there was no Shah. Quietness overwhelmed.
I was a bit shocked when suddenly the telephone rang.
“Hello,” I began.
“Is this Mohd. Shahrul Samad’s house?” a woman’s voice asked.
“Yes, I’m his wife,” I started to feel nervous.
It was a lady’s voice, introduced herself as a nurse, “madam, last night your husband involved in a car accident. He died on the way to the hospital at 9.45p.m. We tried to call you many times last night but failed. We were really sorry”.
I hung up the phone with a trembling hand. Car accident? 9.45p.m.?All about last night came back into my mind. At the moment, I remembered something about last night. Shah came home without his car, no bags and the coldness, the coldness from his body that I felt.
* * *
“Thanks, mom. It’s beautiful,” she looked at the necklace on her neck with her shiny round eyes.
“It is a memory, dear. Take care of it,” I said to her.
It is her twelfth birthday. Shamira Sutina, that is her name. Actually, she is the best memory that Shah left for me.